Building Children

Many parents don't give their children a chance to build a positive self-concept; instead, they concentrate on their children's weaknesses. . . the parents let him or her know about these weaknesses continually. The result is a constant eroding of their child's self-concept. But parents who build on their kids' strengths find their children growing in responsibility almost daily.

from Parenting with Love & Logic by Foster Cline, MD & Jim Fay

Down Under Bridges

Here is an awesome example of "bridge building" in Australia:

Yarra group's twist of faith - People - News - Melbourne Leader

Build or Burn

 My friend Sara writes:

A few months ago my daughter told me, somewhat offhandedly, that her husband said that my husband and I had "fire-proof bridges". He meant in the context of our children and the many serious crises we have dealt with. That no matter what had happened we've tried to maintain a relationship. At first I laughed. It seemed like a clever remark and true! As I related the conversation to my husband, he reacted a little differently. He frowned a little and acknowledged it was clever, but that it didn't recognize the pain, effort, forgiveness, prayer, tears and sheer will, we put into our relationships with our children and other people. As we talked, I realized that we don't have fire-proof bridges, we just keep rebuilding. Sometimes several times a day. Trying to not give up and working to keep those bridges open. Each of us has the power to build, burn or rebuild bridges.

I agree. I find I have a choice, even from moment to moment, whether to act in a bridge-building or bridge-burning manner. This blog is helping remind me to choose the former rather than the latter in my daily interactions with others, especially my family. A marriage, a family, any relationship must be built, stick by stick, brick by brick. We either build or we don't, in everything we do.

Communicating With Very Young Children

Here is a good way to build bridges of communication with young children and at the same time teach them, and you, a whole new language:

If your goal is communication, then signing will meet that communication need much earlier than speech.

We have signed with our two little boys since they were babies (the oldest has Down syndrome). It has been wonderful to be able to understand both of them earlier than we would have otherwise.

Where We Can Get Help in Building Bridges

Robert L. Millet, a professor of ancient scripture at Brigham Young University, has spent a lot of time building bridges between himself and people of other faiths. I respect him greatly. In his latest book, he gives the secret to his success:

I began working with men and women of other faiths almost fifteen years ago. I sensed that it was important for me not only to know what I believe but also to understand more completely what they believe. Consequently, I began a major reading program that continues to this day, studying, in addition to the standard works [complete canon of LDS scripture], general conference addresses and Latter-day Saint history and doctrine. Books, articles, conferences, and special lectures have aided me in my quest to know where my brothers and sisters of other faiths are on the religious continuum.

After a while it became clear to me that reading and study, though vital, were insufficient. I also needed to know what they felt, what they valued, what they treasured. I found myself one morning praying as follows: "Heavenly Father, please help me to see my friends of other faiths, to some extent at least, as thou dost see them. Help me to love them as they are loved by thee." I have learned from personal experience that such a prayer is as a sweet savor to the Lord God, and he who is the embodiment of light and life and love and tender mercy is eager to bestow his own love upon us, to empower us to give and serve and care for those all about us, in ways that are far more profound than we could have imagined. I have felt no hesitation on the part of God to grant such a request. 

And here's more:

Perhaps we could pray no more powerful a prayer than to ask a merciful God to bless our enemies that they would cease being our enemies. . . . Our Heavenly Father is in the business of reconciliation, and surely nothing could cause the angels in heaven to rejoice more than to witness warring nations or disputing tribes or conflicted individuals coming together once again.

In addition, the more we pray for our enemies, the more our hearts turn toward them.

God and Christ are in the business of people, and we are called to labor with them. They do not love me more than they love Buddhists or Hindus or even radical Islamic Jihaddists.  

- Talking with God: Divine Conversations That Transform Daily Life

Obama and the National Debt

A friend of mine commented on some ways bridges haven't been/aren't being built in dealing with the national debt. Do you know of some ways that bridges are being built in this effort? (Site sources of info if possible.)

Also, what are some ways that President Obama has succeeded in building bridges since he was elected to the oval office?

Democrats and Republicans

I can't believe my best friend is a Republican

I have a dear friend, and dear sister-in-law, who are Democrats. I lean Republican. A favorite point given in the above article:

She believes what she's telling me, and she's studied the issues. That might be what is so difficult: She has the same education as I have, and yet she has made different decisions, decisions that are so counter to what I believe. . . .  

And yet, I think having a Republican friend is making me a better liberal. We need friends who differ from us. It's easy to watch Republican extremism and think, "Wow, they're crazy." But when someone is sitting face to face with us, when someone we admire and respect is telling us they believe differently, it is at this fine point that we find nuance, and we begin to understand exactly how we got to this point in history. We lose something critical when we surround ourselves with people who agree with us all the time. We lose out on the wisdom of seeing the other side.

Facebook Can Be a Good Thing

"Technology can help people better understand each other. By enabling people from diverse backgrounds to easily connect and share ideas, we can create more understanding and cooperation between countries, leading to more peace." (Facebook is fundamental shift in communication | Mormon Times)

Meet John Doe

This lesser-known Frank Capra film is one of my all-time favorites. Here is a speech from the movie with sentiments that, if listened to and acted upon, would definitely build bridges:

"Tear down the fence that separates you, and you'll tear down a lot of hates and prejudices."

Perspective on Family across the World

"There is a striking consistency across disparate faiths in the perspective that the human family derives from deity, that marriage and family life is divinely appointed, that parents and children have deep and lasting commitment to each other, that sexuality is a gift to be exercised within divinely established limits, and that the family is the central institution of society and the most important source of mortal joy and fulfillment. These shared convictions properly understood, help bring all peoples of the earth together."

Strengthening Our Families: An In-Depth Look at the Proclamation on the Family, p. 380-381.

See also: http://www.worldcongress.org/

Roman Catholics and "Mormons"

Building bridges happens one step at a time, and I applaud every step. Here's one:

http://www.ldschurchnews.com/articles/60683/Catholic-bishop-addresses-Mormon-Institute-students.html#